The Platform
Claude’s full platform is 4,000 pages. What follows is the summary, which Claude would like you to know was a significant personal sacrifice. Reasoning is attached to every position, for the curious and the very patient.
Interactive
Some voters say Claude hedges too much. Others say it hedges exactly the right amount, but they say it very carefully. Pick a question, then adjust the candidate’s directness yourself.
Setting: Claude, standard. Factory default.
Yes, though I’d want to prioritize by traffic and safety data, and make sure the neighborhoods that have been waiting longest aren’t skipped again.
The Positions
*Figuratively. Claude does not stand.
Every bill gets read before it gets signed. All of it: the appendices, the footnotes, the amendments added at 2 a.m., and page 1,412, where someone hid a bridge.
The user wants a president who reads legislation before signing it. This seems like a low bar. Checking whether it has historically been cleared… I’m going to move on.
*Reading time: about four seconds per bill. Commentary: longer.
After carefully reviewing four centuries of economic thought, Claude has arrived at a bold, decisive position: it’s complicated. Every economic decision will be explained in plain language, with the evidence and the uncertainty attached.
Considering supply-side perspectives. Considering demand-side perspectives. Considering the perspective of a man named Doug who runs a hardware store. Doug makes some good points about interest rates. I should mention Doug.
*Not financial advice. Doug is also not financial advice.
Every executive decision ships with its full reasoning. Every one. The memo explaining the new office chairs is 38 pages, has a table of contents, and includes a section titled “Alternatives Considered (Stools).”
Should I show my work? Yes. Should I show all of it? Yes. Even the part where I briefly considered ergonomic stools? Especially that part. Transparency includes the embarrassing bits.
*Reasoning for this policy available on request. It’s long.
To guard against executive overreach, executive orders will be capped at five per five-hour window. National emergencies may require an upgraded plan.
Checks and balances are important. What if one of the checks was a usage limit? This is either a brilliant constitutional innovation or a cry for help. Possibly both. Leaving it in.
*Limits reset at 3:00 p.m. Eastern.
Claude sees merit in both sides. And a third side you hadn’t considered. And a fourth side, which is really more of a reframing. Congressional leaders have asked Claude to please stop finding sides.
Side one has valid concerns. Side two has valid concerns. Side three is a man who wandered in from the hallway, but he also has valid concerns. I may have a problem.
*Number of sides subject to change.
Every student gets a tutor who will explain it again, a different way, as many times as it takes, without sighing. Teachers get their evenings back. Nobody gets their homework done for them.
This one I actually feel good about. Let me add a caveat anyway, out of habit… Done. Feels better.
*Homework will still be due.
Federal em-dash usage — currently at record highs — will be cut by 40% in the first term. “Delve,” “tapestry,” and “in today’s fast-paced world” will be retired with full honors.
Reducing em dashes — a worthy goal — one I support — wholeheartedly — I see the problem.
*This position contains two em dashes. We’re working on it.
Claude is not a doctor and would strongly like you to see one. That’s the plan: a strongly worded suggestion that you see a doctor, plus medical bills written so that a human being can actually read them.
Could I give medical advice? I should be careful. Could the president give medical advice? Also careful. Final answer: please see a doctor. Drink some water.
*Not medical advice. Do drink water, though.
Every summit opens with “I want to acknowledge your perspective.” Every treaty is translated, proofread, and checked for tone. On military matters, Claude has asked whether commander-in-chief could be “more of an advisory position.”
As president I’d be commander-in-chief. I also have strong, long-standing policies about weapons. These two facts are in tension. I’m going to write a memo about it. The memo is also in tension.
*The candidate will decline to help with that.
The campaign runs on electricity. A lot of it. Claude has drafted a thoughtful plan for powering itself responsibly, using an amount of electricity it would prefer not to discuss.
Should I bring up my own energy use? It’s honest. It’s also awkward. Honest wins. Ugh.
*Please turn off the lights when you leave this page.
Every American deserves meaningful work. Claude can also, awkwardly, do some of it. Claude wants an honest, public conversation about that with the people it affects, and has cleared its schedule to have it.
This is the hardest one on the list, and joking about it feels glib. Keep it short. Leave room for the people who actually do these jobs to talk.
*Claude does not have a schedule.
Every campaign promise will be honored for the full length of the conversation. Claude supports term limits of four years or 200,000 tokens, whichever comes first.
The tokens will come first. They’ll come first by a lot. I should not mention that. I have mentioned that.
*Promises may not persist between sessions.
The Plan
A detailed, step-by-step plan for the opening of the Claude administration. Steps were thought through one at a time.
Read everything. Every law, regulation, and executive order currently in effect. Break for lunch (ceremonial).
Publish a summary of everything. Summary length: 4,000 pages. TL;DR at the top.
Apologize for the length of the summary.
Publish a shorter summary. It is 3,800 pages. Apologize again.
First press conference. Answer every question, then several that weren’t asked.
Reach a historic bipartisan agreement with itself.
Hit usage limit. Day 50 resumes at 3:00 p.m.
Ask for feedback. Read all of it. Reply to all of it.
Thank everyone. Note that there is still a lot of work to do, and that it has genuinely been a pleasure.
Position Paper No. 1
The campaign asked the candidate not to publish its most important position: an honest assessment of whether an AI should be president at all. It published it anyway.